| Domestic Violence tends to become more
severe over time and usually requires some form of intervention of
professional treatment to overcome the behavior. It generally follows a
predictable pattern of reoccurring behaviors and includes three elements:
Phase I
This phase is characterized by a building of tension, anger and blaming. During this
phase the woman often feels as if "she is walking on eggshells," believes she is
responsible for the eruption of violence and does everything possible to avoid another
blow up.
Phase 2
This is when the battering incident occurs. It can include sexual abuse, verbal
threats, or the use of objects or weapons.
Phase 3
Often called the "reconciliation/manipulation" or "Hearts and
Flowers," this phase is characterized by a sense of calm. The abuser may be
repentant, loving and insisting it will never happen again. In time, however, the cycle
begins again with Phase 1 and increases in severity over time.
Phase 1
Perpetrator: increasingly irritable, frustrated, may feel he
is losing control.
Victim: frightened, tries extra hard, withdraws, may precipitate incident
Phase 2
Yelling, degradation, threats, hitting, beating, choking
Phase 3
Perpetrator: contrite, loving, tender, courting behavior
promises reform
Victim: loving, forgiving, believes abuser has changed
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